Wednesday, October 19, 2011

A "complete" song....

This week's lesson....in life, in order to have a "complete" song...you must have both 'high' notes, and 'low' notes.

All 'high notes', and you get a sound that can almost begin to hurt your ears.  You just can't sustain that for long.  You need to be able to settle back down.  All 'low notes', and the song gets dismal, dreary, and to me just stagnant.  You feel as if it "isn't going anywhere".  It just doesn't do much to lighten your spirit.  If you're really lucky, you get the beautiful sound in between the highs and lows...known as the 'melody'...the thing that carries you through.  I believe that the highs are meant to 'enhance'...the lows are meant to be your foundation, to learn from and build on.  And, the melody is really just the "whole point"!

Our 'highs' come in forms such as that amazing weekend with our Il Volo family, which, I just wrote about in the last post.  They also come from each of "Mia's Miracles", of which, you are one.
Our 'lows' come way too often in the form of pain and suffering for our Mia.

Nights like tonight are a low.  8 weeks out of surgery...8 weeks in this horrible body cast, and still her spasms and pain are unrelenting.  I sit for hours and rub her little leg.  I watch her as she wiggles and moans in pain.  "Are you ok, Mia ?"..."what can Mamma do?"...."just rub me" says her little voice.  "Just stay with me and rub me."  And, so I do.  Willingly.  Gladly.  Anything to ease her pain.  Anything to see her smile.  There were no smiles tonight, just pain and sadness.  As she lay there clutching her "Ignazio" pillow in one hand, and her "Goofy" doll in the other,  I watched as she began to relax and doze off, and, my heart ached.  Please don't misunderstand me here. We, as parents (and every parent I have spoken with whose child has hip dysplasia has said the same thing!) in the grand scheme of things, we are very, very VERY grateful.  We are wise enough to know our blessings.  When it comes to what is wrong with our children, we are grateful that it is, so called, "structural" and can be fixed !!!  And, we, I, thank God everyday for that !!!  The problem is that the 'uncertainty', the 'fear', the 'pain', the 'suffering'... they are all very, very real.  I want so badly to take this from my Mia and do this for her, I could die.  I would die. For her, absolutely. 
However, I can't....and right now, I, Daddy, and each of you have the amazing privilege of being her 'melody'.  The thing that carries her through.

One day, she will be strong enough to sing her own melody, and, while your 'part' may change, you will always have a role to play, and we will always be so grateful and blessed that each of you have chosen to be part of Mia's song.

When you aren't strong enough to be your own 'melody', I believe God gives you those you'll need to help carry you through.  I also believe that you always have that choice for others.  You can choose whether or not to be someone's melody, and carry them through.  You can choose the part you will play in their life.  A 'high', a 'low', or a 'melody'.  "Enhance" , make "dreary", or "carry them through"...always yours to decide. 
Each day, new songs....new opportunities.
The fact that you are here is no accident.  You chose to click on her link.  You chose to visit this blog.  By doing so, you chose to be part of her song.  And, your music warms our hearts.

I made this page to share Mia's journey with you.  Sometimes we celebrate.  Sometimes we cry. 
But, all of it, we do together !!!  In perfect harmony.

With a Mommy's "singing with gratefulness" heart,
xoxoxo

2 comments:

  1. OH, Mama Gina!
    God loves you all sooo much! I know all of us who love our Mia and her Mamma and Daddy will continue to pray for her. She is often in my thoughts. One day, you will be looking back at all this and though you know how you did it --with friends and family -- it will still be amazing! I love your little Mia, you, and her Daddy and hope and pray for more peace and much less pain.

    Love,
    Linda Carr

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  2. WOW...BOY am I glad I waited...This is just PROFOUND! Gina...sometimes I want to reach right up and grab the "BIG GUY UPSTAIRS" and yell..WHY!!!! But...someday..we'll know. Until then...it's an uphill battle..and I wish there was something I could do..I know we ALL wish there was something we could do to help...but..it is just her healing going on. If she didn't feel the pain..her nerves wouldn't be healing. They'd be dead..and that is one shining moment. As long as she has the pain...and it comes and goes..the nerves in that leg are still VIABLE..and she will not be numb in the future! (One ray of hope in a sea of MUDDY MESS)...I love you all and wish for Mia a week of NO PAIN...and a lifetime of walking, running, skipping and jumping. <3

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